Fuegos Taco Shack & Grill - Bakersfield

Long has it been since I've drawn my pen shining, but I return for the same reason I began: I've found a new best breakfast burrito in Bakersfield.

The journey has been treacherous. Old favorites have been returned to the annals of distaste. Long-standing champs laid waste to new cooks, over-turned management, and the ever-present onslaught of impending greasiness.

Caucacity abounds on the streets of Bakersfield pushing tastes ever further into the depths of mayonnaise, Kraft singles, and butter noodles. Taco trucks come and taco trucks go, but a new contender has been born from the dust serving up "fresh food, not fast food."

I heard about Fuego's from a friend at the bar, so I went the very next day. I had Asada tacos and an Al Pastor burrito. It took 20 minutes or so to get what I ordered, but time is of little importance when taste is the highest concern. Every time I looked up anxiously to see if my order was ready a person was busting their ass over a hot stove and a sign read on the window like a warning as well as a guarantee "fresh food, not fast food."

I have often said I will pay extra and wait longer if they'll just do the damn thing right the first time. A cook blaming their ingredients, their time, or their patron's lack of complacency and support in their grand plan seems like a cop-out, and I refuse to be a contributor to the problem.

So I waited, and my wait was rewarded with hot and delicious fresh food. I sped through an Al Pastor burrito and asada tacos with a fervor facilitated by a bottle of coke. The Al Pastor was fucking fantastic. However, I wasn't moved to write a review...Not yet.

I returned, had more tacos and more burritos. Still, no pressure from the muse. No whispers in the mind. Nothing.

I've driven thousands of miles. Eaten hundreds of burritos in less days. Searched far and wide with beard-face earnest, so the muse doesn't always bare itself to me in all the vulgarity I think I deserve.

I carried on beaten and battered. Lost without a burrito to call home. No morning endeavor holds much promise. That is, until today.

Today, I sought Fuego's breakfast burrito. The #3...although I saw no numbers or even the mention of a breakfast burrito outside of a single white sheet of paper announcing their availability between 7:30am and 10:30am.

Bacon, seasoned potatoes, scrambled eggs, pico de gallo, your choice of red, green, or their own Fuego salsa, and, finally, your choice of meat. That's right, bacon is a condiment. For my money, Al Pastor all the time. Their pork is deliciously seasoned and succulent. The saltiness of the bacon does a back flip in tandem with the peppery potatoes. Scrambled eggs fluff up the burrito giving the illusion of lightness while the pico delivers freshness and acidity to the rich ensemble.

With Fuego sauce, like many scratchmade salsas, one can never be sure which level of heat has shown up. I've had it a few times now, and this morning's batch was by far the hottest and tastiest. Honestly, I needed another cup, but that could be my own problem.

Order came to about $7. To some, I understand this may seem steep, but there were no microwaves. No reheating. The meat you order is cooked for you. Everything you ask for is cooked for you right there. Fresh and hot. You can easily drop more money for way less at any fast food joint. Do your stummy a favor and give it a little fire. You'll be as stoked as I am.

El Sitio - Ventura, CA

Nuzzled in snugly to Django's Coffee House in Ventura, CA is a small, unassuming delight. My guide on this adventure raves about the al pastor, so we decide to split a burrito and load up on salsas. 

Being our third burrito of the day, one may question the voracity of our appetites, but rest-assured the allure of marinated pork swaddled in a thick chewy tortilla can coax a growl out of the fullest of stomachs. 

Succulent and tender bits of pork were buried deep in a fiery spectrum of rice, beans, and spices. A welcome counterpoint to the airy cuts of shark and substantial chunks of steak. Lesser spots may try to skirt by on the same pork used for the carnitas only to dress up the differences between al pastor and chile verde as the sauce one uses, but this pork had the char of slow braising after being massaged with spices to differentiate from such imposters.

The salsas were fresh and effective, but I fancied the orange habanero most for its complexity and heat.

By far the most out of the way spot located in a quiet neighborhood in the more suburban part of Ventura, but well worth a stop to round out the day. 

Three more remain as we prepare for the return of Chris the Sound Guy and his episode showcasing the burrito adventure in its full splendor. 

King Taco, Los Angeles

Let's get one thing clear before I divulge my experiences with King Taco. They make a good taco for a good price, and I could eat 10 of them. They pile on the asada, there's good spicy red salsa, and the onions and cilantro deliver as one would expect from a quality Taqueria.

Now, if I really wanted 10 tacos, would I be willing to put up with the overall experience of ordering at King Taco? Hmm...

I guess that's a long line...

When I arrived there was a bit of a line. Maybe 15 people were ahead of me, not Pink's level, but enough to assume the place is doing something right. The tables all seemed to be filled with patrons not eating but waiting to receive their orders while only two of the three registers available were taking orders.

All told D and I were in line for close to 30 minutes until we were allowed to order some tacos, a nacho, and an al pastor burrito because their huge pork spit was seducing me with its slow turns. Another 15 minutes before our food is called out, and I am able to survey this chronophagic assemblage.

The first thing I notice is how small this burrito I just paid $6 for is, and I'm cautiously optimistic in hoping they aren't skimping on ingredients so -- blah blah balh big things in small packages blah blah -- nope, none of that.

I thought it may have been overly-cooked onions mixed with the raw or possibly heavy use of cilantro, but something was definitely off in the al pastor flavor department. Nothing blends in the burrito, so every bite is an unpleasant hodgepodge of mediocre ingredients.

The nachos took me back to high school lunch lines with the chips being poured out of a 5 pound bag into a bin with Chernobyl yellow cheese sauce pumped out on top. Hardly the stuff of kings, but one may be fooled by the $5 chips and cheese price tag.

I'm almost certain my high school wasn't staffed with above-average, volunteer, teenage food service workers, so I can't imagine why it took them so long to assemble this meal. Perhaps what is even more vexing is why anyone would wait around for this quality of food when Los Angeles hosts more Mexican food restaurants and taco trucks than any other place in the US.

Over-priced food, under-whelming flavors, and thoroughly disappointing wait times leaves me shaking rather than bowing my head to King Taco.

Los Cuñados

If there ain't a spit, their al pastor ain't shit.

Alright, good.

My buddy, Hector, tells me there's a spot on Chester near Ming in Bakersfield that sells out constantly, and they are only open for dinner and the drunks. Sounds exactly like the spot I need to get my burrito fix.

Los Cuñados is parked in front of one of those shady rent-to-own outfits in a bedraggled asphalt lot with pot holes and evil on display. The bright halogen lights and neon signs act as a beacon in the night, ferrying wayward souls towards burrito salvation.

For most of my life, I have never been excited by al pastor. I thought of it as a funky carnitas substitute because I didn't know, nor had I had, better. Then D took me to Tacos Leo in Los Angeles, and the whole world of Middle-East meets Southwest opened up for me.

Al pastor directly translates to "shepherd-style" referring to the shawarma technique brought over by Lebanese immigrants. Shawarma involves spit-grilling meats and slicing off the outer-layers to fill your vessel of choice.

The guys manning the truck hooked it up fat with a super tasty burrito. There is a good amount of chilis and spices used on the meat, but not over-powering like I'm chewing on a chili mango sucker. I heavily employed both the red and green salsas not for lack of flavor but because both are so good. Other fixings like lemons, carrots, onions, and radishes are also available.

I'm not sure I needed another reason to drink then eat burritos, but I'll take it. If you are looking for authentic al pastor in Bakersfield, you'd be hard-pressed to find a better spot.

Taco Truck Tuesday - Truck Vs Truck

Carne Asada Burrtio From Estilo Jalisco

Al Pastor Burrito From Tacos Jalisco

Two taco trucks take refuse near Pacheco on Union in South Bakersfield: Tacos Jalisco and Estilo Jalisco. Located directly across from each other, these warring brethren go taco for taco every evening. 

At first glance, the competition seems trivial as I approach Tacos Jalisco in full swing with 15 hungry customers waiting patiently outside. I order an al pastor burrito and one asada taco, and my buddy crossed the way to order Asada burritos from Estilo Jalisco. 

In the time I sat waiting for the AP burritos form TJ I could have ordered 16 burritos from EJ, but I'm a patient person willing to wait for good food. To be fair, EJ was not working against a crowd like their mirror match. 

We returned to my buddy's house to assess our bounty in uninterrupted earnest. 

TJ's presentation brings a lot of color instantly activating my salivary glands while EJ's salsas and burrito take on a much milder tone with the tortilla appearing grey by comparison. 

My first bite of the al pastor is filled with flavor, but the next few bites were a little heavy on the cilantro which was packed into a tight green tube running the length of the burrito. Both the green and red salsas brought a good amount of depth, I preferred the red, but not a lot of heat to be found in either option. 

The asada, on the other hand, is well-seasoned, not over, and has the dimensions and weight of a brick. No nonsense to be found, just the basics done well. The salsas here are hotter, but lack the freshness and pop of TJ's salsa. 

If the al pastor is a sports car with all its flash and show, the asada is an old beater you can always depend on to get you from a to b. 

There are better places for both burritos in Bakersfield, but I have to give the overall win to Taco Jalisco's al pastor burrito. Its fresh ingredients and flavorful salsas went a long way towards securing victory. EJ's asada is a good solid effort, but in a town only a few hours from Mexico good asada isn't in short supply.

That said, after having TJ's asada taco, maybe they should cross the street and ask their neighbors for help. With the impressive quality of the al pastor and salsa the shallow tongue-numbing flavor in their steak was appalling.